Where's Waldo

So leave it to the youth to come up with new and inventive ways for adults to embarrass themselves. A month or so ago, we had our ward youth planning meeting where we plan out the combined activities for the year. The laurels announced their idea and it was to play Where's Waldo. I had never played this game and so innocently I asked, "How do you play Where's Waldo?"

"It's where you dress up in a disguise, hide in Wal-Mart and we have to find you."

"Come again?"

"It's where you dress up..."

"No I heard that part, I had just hoped I hadn't. So you want some of your leaders to dress up?"

"And you...well the whole bishopric actually."

That was pretty evil I thought. Put you on the spot in front of all the youth and of course as they are describing the activity, the rest of the youth all start nodding their heads and smiling. There are just some times when you know you have been beaten. So, it was scheduled. The first Wednesday in September, several leaders from the ward and the entire bishopric would dress up and place themselves throughout Wal-Mart and wait for groups of teenagers to come find them. First group to find all the hidden leaders and get their signatures wins. I have to admit if I hadn't been one of the selected hiders, I would have thought this was a fantastic idea for an activity. But since I was a selected leader, I was now failing to see the spiritual growth that would occur based on this activity. Upon second thought, we would have to cancel and come up with a different idea.

But we didn't. So the night before, I found myself struggling with what my "Waldo Disguise" would be. My first thought was to get some self-tanning lotion and a do-rag and try to dress myself up as a Hispanic "gangsta" type of character. Well...let me just say that that self-tanning stuff doesn't do crap and now I have a big orange spot on my right calf. Anyway, now it is getting desparate. So Shannon goes out on the day of and procures a nice house dress fit for an eighty year old and wonderful wig that...well let's just say it fit with the house dress. That night, I put both of those on and some glasses, knee high pantyhose and a pillow in my basketball shorts underneath the house dress so I would have a little extra junk in the trunk and set off for Wal-Mart. Before I left, my kids got a little freaked out, especially Kate, but Braden did tell me afterward that he was glad I wasn't the old granny anymore.

It is funny that what seems ridiculous when you are in the comfort of your own home, begins to feel downright horrifying the closer you get to Wal-Mart. I pulled into the parking lot and probably would have just left if Rhett hadn't pulled up next to me. He had apparently been circling the parking lot waiting for someone else to arrive. He had chosen to go with the homeless guy look and was going to set up shop right outside the front door. That must have been a sight. A homeless looking guy and a large grandmother figure who couldn't have been less feminine walking together through the parking lot of Wal-Mart. Anyway, Rhett took his position and I walked inside trying to be inconspicuous while being the most conspicuous thing that has walked through their front door in over a week. I made a bee-line straight for the motorized carts and got in one and tried to hunch over and just get out of the entry way. I don't think I have ever seen a greeter in Wal-Mart with a more confused and slightly scared look on her face than the one I drove past. In fact, throughout the store, people would avoid looking at me until they were right even with me and then just turn and gape directly at me. That was kind of funny.

When I got in position in the pet food area, I filled my cart with dog food and started to wait. It hadn't been three minutes when over the loudspeaker I hear, "Security camera for men's wear, Security camera for men's wear!" I thought to myself, "Yep, we all must be getting in position. Let's just pray for no arrests."

I sat there for another 5 minutes when I see Shawn Wakefield trying to find a place to position himself in his disguise which consisted of...A HAT!!!! Are you kidding me???? That was pretty lame and he got an earful later, but anyway, he looked right at me, but I could tell he didn't recognize me as he started into the garden center. So I hunched over and slowly turned my cart into the garden center. As I wheeled in, I saw him walking and called out, "Wakefield!" He looked back and couldn't see anyone who would have called his name and kept right on walking. I followed him for a little while until he finally turned and looked at me, did a double take and then realized who I was. His response? "You have got to be kidding me?" No I don't suppose I am.

As it turned out, most of the leaders didn't go all out in the dress up department, but a few did. One of those who did was Tommy Nicholas. He is maybe thirty at best and has dark hair. He dressed himself up in a dirty gray wig with a baseball cap took a nebulizer and the facemask and wheeled himself around Wal-Mart in a wheelchair. He also added a bit of weight to his physique. He looked awesome. He wheeled himself up to a few people he knew and none of them recognized him and he basically made them uncomfortable for a few minutes until he finally would reveal himself. He even went up to one individual and said, "Hey, remember me?" That poor man tried to pretend that he in fact did remember this individual and was asking how he was doing when Tommy finally told him who he was. He didn't find it near as funny as we all did later on. Another good one was Nathan Smith who dressed up as a very large fat lady. He even went with the makeup and everything. I didn't get a picture of him, but I heard he looked awesome. The funny story there is he looked real enough that most people were buying the character. So when he went to leave, he wanted a Coke and went to the check out. He felt around and realized he had no cash and so explained to the cashier that he only had a debit card. Apparently when he started talking, the cashier looked up at him quickly in horror. I would love to know what story that lady's family was told that night. Meanwhile, Rhett was so believable, that several of the youth walked right past him including his own son who looked him square in the face and didn't give him a second thought. This was a pretty good activity.

I couldn't bring myself to ride that cart back through the entrance dressed as I was, so I ended up making the switch in the dog food area and stuffed the whole outfit in my purse. It was still pretty embarrassing to have to ride that cart to the front of the store as a 36 year old man with a purse, but I will take that again as opposed to the old lady who got more stares than if Brad Pitt were to have walked through the door.

Below are some of the pictures of the different leaders "Where's Waldo?" outfits. I would love to do this again. But I have dibs on the homeless guy character. At least I wouldn't have to actually make it in the store.