It Should Be A National Holiday

When I was on my mission in England, I once saw a billboard of a doofy looking guy with nappy long blonde hair in what appeared to be his wedding photo. The caption next to the photo said, "Best Day of My Life? No Way! United Lost To Nottingham 2-0." I don't know why that billboard sticks in my mind so well after all these years, but I have always thought it was clever. It has also come to be a little representative in my mind of my early dating experiences with Shannon. That poor, wonderful woman began dating me in the month of March. In fact, we just had the 14th anniversary of our 1st date on March 10th. What she could never have known but quickly learned, is that part of the package that is Ryan Rapier is an acceptance that March is a special month. A month where normally important things get set aside for the greater good that is the NCAA Basketball Tournament, otherwise known as March Madness. The fact that we stayed together and eventually married despite the fact that she had to compete with the tournament during our first month of dating is really quite remarkable. It is funny, because I don't watch sports a lot. In fact, as far as being a sports widow, Shannon has done pretty well. But that all changes with the first tip on the third weekend in March.

She may have thought it was just a ridiculous phase that would pass once we were married. However, that first March of our married life (two months into wedded bliss) she learned otherwise. She had to put up with my friend Preston being at our house almost two full weekends in a row with both of us basically ignoring anything she said. This only got worse the next year when UofA made their national championship run. At least she learned to invite her friend Becky over as well so someone would actually listen to her and carry on a conversation that didn't go something like, "What would you like for dinner?"

(Silence)

"Honey, what would you like for dinner?"

"NOOOOO!!!"

"You don't want dinner?"

"Huh?"

"I was asking what you wanted for dinner and you basically said you didn't want any."

"What are you talking about?"

"DINNER! Do you want any?!?"

"Hadn't thought about it. Whatever you want to...YESSSSSS!!! ...What were we talking about again?"

She had to go to bed several times alone while I stayed up and finished out the day's games. She missed some really great games by the way, but when I tried to describe them to her, she didn't seem that interested. However, she was a good sport and at least tried to sound interested at first.

Finally after a few years, we just accepted our short separations and I would go off and watch games with some friends at a sports bar. She is a saint for letting me do this.

So, tomorrow, I will leave her alone again and head down to Mesa to hang out with the same friends and watch basketball at a sports bar for about 8 hours straight while drinking way to much soda and eating chicken wings that will give me heartburn like I have never experienced before. I know this because each year I get older and the heartburn gets worse. We will ruin some waitresses night because we will order no alcohol and sodas have free refills thereby killing her chance at a good tip from one table for the entire day. We start out the day geniuses for our astute basketball knowlegde in picking the perfect bracket. 8 hours later, I will throw that same bracket in the trash because it is a testament to my stupidity about college basketball. In other words, I will experience a sort of heaven on earth that comes around just once a year. I can't imagine why everyone doesn't want to do this. So, I officially wish everyone, everywhere, A truly Merry March Madness Day. May all of your bracket predictions come true. Unless you are in my basketball pool in which case, may your weekend end in a horrible twisted wreck of despair.