6:30 a.m. - Can't sleep any longer in anticipation of visiting Disney World with my kids. Ok, maybe it is more along the line of my hips hurt and my bladder will not survive one more instant without some relief. Either way, I am up and going.
6:50 a.m. - I am dressed and ready to go. Shannon is just getting out of bed and the kids are still asleep. Clearly something is going to have to happen or she or I will be dead within two hours from me bugging her to go and her telling me to chill out. I decide to go down to breakfast. The hotel has no Dr. Pepper and breakfast didn't take very long so I get in the car to scout out where the sweet nectar will be available during our stay in beautiful Central Florida. I find a gas station and purchase a 20 oz. bottle. I also meet Igor. He and I will become fast friends before the week is over. Now the funny thing is, Shannon and I never mentioned this once the whole week, but she knew I was going out to get my Dr. Pepper and I knew that she knew. But again, now matter how pathetic she may find this...what should we call it...addiction, it saved us both from me being my annoying self trying to get people out the door and to the parks. So a silent truce was called and mutual understanding formed.
7:30 a.m. - Get kids up. Logan's face breaks into a grin before he even opens his eyes as he says he is going to Epcot. That is the kind of excitement that makes this whole thing worth it. Unfortunately...
7:40 a.m. - Logan has stripped down to his skivvies and is getting ready to put his clothes on for the day when he looks at me with tears in his eyes. He says, "Today is a little weird for me." I thought he was going to follow this up with how hard it will be to not be in school and how he will miss his friends. Those thoughts went out the window in a millisecond as he follows this statement with the little cough of doom. You know the one. The signal cough for I am going to puke in 10, 9, 8...and he does. At least he made it to the toilet. Poor kid is running a fever and now shaking all over. CRAP!
8:02 a.m. - Logan goes to sleep on me while the rest of the family goes to breakfast. We have entered that holding pattern while we try to figure out what we are going to do without really having any idea what we are going to do.
8:43 a.m. - We have drugged Logan up and we are waiting to see how this goes in the next ten minutes. The fever seems to be going down and he is showing signs of life and so we say, "The heck with our child's health, we paid big money to be here and we have a schedule to keep." And we loaded everyone in and headed to Epcot.
9:16 a.m. - We park and we join the masses heading for the front gate. The night before we saw a sign remarking on the fact that all bodies of water in Florida have snakes and Alligators in them. That is comforting as we walk past a body of water in the parking lot...OR DID WE?????????? (More to come on that later)
9:18 a.m. - Nice man offers to take a picture of our whole family at the entrance to the park in front of the giant golf ball. Unfortunately, he totally leaves out the golf ball. For that matter, he leaves out Braden as well. Oh well, I guess it is the thought that counts. Right?
9:23 a.m. - Logan still isn't doing great so we decide to rent him a stroller. We would come to realize this was the best decision we made the whole trip. However, he wasn't crazy about being 5 years old and riding in a stroller...until we came up with the idea that he is King Logan and we are his servants wheeling him around the park. He was fine with that. So the rest of the day when we wanted him to get in the stroller, we simply said, "All right King Logan" and he would hop right in and away we would go.
9:42 a.m. - First ride of the day...Spaceship Earth. A pretty cool ride that is similar to pirates in that it has a lot of animatronic figures, similar to the haunted mansion in that it is a continuous car ride AND it takes place in what looks like a giant golf ball. Those three things add up to awesome ride. Then you factor in that at the end of the ride, they take your picture and place your face on a cartoon character and tell a little story about what your life will be like in the future. This is very fascinating and comical. Braden looked slightly drugged out with his picture and so through the whole cartoon he had the appearance of DUHH! Logan and Shannon's car didn't quite work right and didn't get a picture of Shannon I guess, so there were two Logans in his cartoon.
10:01 a.m. - Next ride, Mission to Mars. This ride simulates blasting off in a rocket and travelling to Mars...hence the name I suppose. The ride offers two different options as the full simulation can be pretty intense. Everyone but me chooses the less intense version. I go for the gusto. Let me just say that I have never had problems on a ride before in my life...until now. That was the first time I seriously considered puking on a ride. Not only that, it started a headache that would plague the rest of my morning. Neat ride, but Wow.
10:25 a.m. - Next we rode Test Track. Cool ride sponsored by GM. So after the ride they have all these cars you can sit in if you wish. One was a Camaro. Abby was very excited as she climbed in. While I took the picture, I could see her in a driver's seat and nearly hyperventilated. Then I realized it is still four years away and calmed down. Then I realized it is only four years away and full on hyperventilated. Ok not really, but I did make her get out of the car fairly quickly.
10:55 a.m. - After Test Track we were off to the Nemo ride. Now, I had just recently been through the Mission to Mars situation and was still trying to get my bearings. Shannon has never been good with crazy movement on screen. So you can imagine how that set when we had our car stop in the Nemo ride right in the middle of the scene depicting the EAC (not Eastern Arizona College, the something something current...go watch Finding Nemo if it is important to you what it actually stands for). It was a room that makes you feel like you are in the middle of swirling water zooming past you along with fish and turtles. Both Shannon and I started to get a little nauseous again.
10:40 a.m. - Exiting the Nemo ride, you come into a big room dimly lit with lots of fish. After a bathroom break, I come out and cannot find my family. I am still dealing with my headache and the low lighting is not helping. Of course cell phone coverage is crap and so Shannon won't answer her phone. Starting to get a little angry when I discover them in the area ready to do Turtle Talk with Crush. Logan is a little freaked out because this puffer fish keeps looking directly at him and following him. He ends up standing behind Shannon so it can't see him anymore. Shannon and I are both feeling a little iffy and agree getting out of the dimly lit area filled with screaming children might be in our best interest.
11:30 a.m. - Logan is heading south and so we agree that lunch is in order and another dose of Motrin. After Mission to Mars, Nemo and the whole dimly lit area, I take a shot of Motrin myself.
11:42 p.m. - Kids have first of many chicken nugget meals
12:47 p.m. - Do Test Track again. While in line, I look over and this guy has on a massive ring. I look closer and it looks like a Super Bowl ring. I have never seen one in person and so being a total idiot, I say, "Excuse me, is that a Super Bowl Ring?" "Yes." Now the conversation has reached a point where I am in awe and yet out of anything intelligent to say. So I can't remember if I responded Wow or Cool. I try to make a little more small talk, but it fails miserably.
12:59 p.m. - Ready to head over to the World Showcase. No wait, all the kids want to do the big golf ball again. Cool ride so I don't argue. Plus, I use the ride to lean my head back and catch a small cat nap. This is day one. Not a good sign.
1:18 p.m. - Finally, we are ready to head over to the World Showcase. This is the part I have been looking forward to. But wait, we pass by an ice cream stand and everyone but me agrees that is what should come next...FINE! But hurry, you have 5 minutes. I lost that one too. Anyway, while I am waiting for them, I go into a Coca Cola store thinking I might find something to drink. Boy did I!!! Free soda from around the world. You could get as many samples as you wanted. I got them all. And I didn't feel bad about it. Especially since the one from Italy, I think, tasted like what I imagine motor oil to taste like. But the Ginger Ale from China and the Costa Rica drink were, dare I say, the soda BOMB! Even in print I can't pull that off.
1:32 p.m. - OK, now finally we are ready to go to the World Showcase...except wait. For some reason everyone thinks now is the best time to stop at an outdoor cart selling silly hats. We spend 10 minutes all trying the hats on and then taking pictures. Not terrible I guess, but now I am REALLY ready to go to the World Showcase.
1:41 p.m. - OK, NOW WE ARE REALLY FINALLY READY to go to the World Showcase...No. Shannon and Braden must stop for the bathroom.
1:48 p.m. - Braden returns from the bathroom.
1:53 p.m. - Thinking about telling Braden to go back in and see if Shannon has fallen in.
1:58 p.m. - Now I am not sure if I care that she has fallen in, I am about ready to leave her. (I didn't say any of this out loud did I? I did? Crap. That will undoubtedly lead to...)
2:01 p.m. - Shannon finally shows up and I throw a small tantrum for which I get in trouble. Of course no one can control nature any more than someone can control a theme park bathroom only having two stalls. Once I am properly chastened we move on to...THE WORLD SHOWCASE
2:16 p.m. - The first thing we see is Canada. Pretty cool 360 degree movie with Martin Short.
3:02 p.m. - Moving on to England...AAAHHHH England. But wait, before we can get there, there is a stage with a band. What could it be? Men in kilts playing either electric guitars or the bagpipes. Just ponder that for a moment. Done? Ok.
3:28 p.m. - Shopping in England and finally I find what I have been waiting for. Mars Bars! Not the cruddy Mars Bars you get here in the states, but rather the perfection that is the British Mars Bar which coincidentally helped sustain me many a day on my mission. I buy one for the whole family. I don't care that they cost almost $3 each...ok I care a little bit and almost didn't buy one for anyone else but me. But then I pick the other four back up and buy them anyway. My whole family deserves the joy that is a British Mars bar.
3:44 p.m. - Pictures in the UK
4:11 p.m. - Pictures in France.
4:45 p.m. - Abby calls her friend Samantha. The day before she had called her from the car. Now keep in mind they had not talked about this trip prior to us leaving because our kids didn't know about it. So when they talked on Sunday it was "You won't believe what happened to us today. (Followed by full explanation.) So today when Abby calls, she says to Samantha, guess where I am calling you from. "Where?" "Paris, France." I have to wonder what went through Samantha's mind. If it were me, I would be thinking, "Holy crap, my parents need to get with the program. First Abby gets to go to Florida and now she is in France? Clarification is made and they have a nice chat.
4:56 p.m. - Braden states unequivocally he does not want to meet the Princesses stationed in France.
4:58 p.m. - Logan has started back down again and is freezing. So before we leave France, we bundle him up in the stroller in two different jackets.
4:59 p.m. - Logan is asleep in the stroller. Probably for the best.
5:03 p.m. - Abby picks up from earlier and begins trying out different headwear of which we get pictures. We actually had a lot of fun with this.
5:12 p.m. - Logan said the only people he wanted to see were Aladdin and Jasmine. Well as we come up on Morocco, who do we see but Aladdin and Jasmine. We hold a 10 minute debate on whether we should wake him up or not. We go for not and will ask forgiveness later.
5:17 p.m. - They are holding the annual Food and Wine Festival at Epcot and so every few yards there is a little stand where you can purchase a sample of food from a different country. We see someone who has purchased the Belgian waffle and decide we will break down and try that. OH MY GOSH!!! Totally delicious!
5:20 p.m. - Shopping in Morocco. Abby fascinated with Belly Dancer costume. Not good for Shannon and I on so many levels.
5:35 p.m. - Heading into Japan, the little booth with food from Japan is selling California Spring rolls (Sushi). I buy one and offer $10 to any kid who will try it. No takers. Somehow though, I get Abby to take the smallest portion possible of Wasabi and put it on her tongue. I am still not sure if I have been forgiven for that.
5:45 p.m. - Wake Logan up unceremoniously and carry him into the American Adventure show. Neat show. Also nice opportunity to sit for a moment after a full day of walking. I am not going to lie. I took my shoes off. I didn't smell anything, but I wouldn't have cared if I did. It felt like a little slice of heaven. Unfortunately, while putting them back on, I caught my phone in the seat and broke my phone clip. Karma I guess. Although, I would still make that deal.
6:10 p.m. - Time for dinner. Italy is up next and something everyone would enjoy so it makes since doesn't it?
6:18 p.m. - Not when you see that the cheapest pizza costs $28, and that will feed two people. Now I am the biggest proponent of just biting down and accepting that prices are going to be inflated when you go to a Disney park. If you stress about prices, you will be miserable. But even I have my limits. So now, we don't know what to do. We decide that Shannon and Abby will continue on and look for something while I will go back to Morocco and get a Kebab. We will meet back at the America pavilion where we will get the boys...wait for it...Chicken Nuggets.
6:38 p.m. - I had gotten back with my Kebab and waiting to get started when Shannon and the kids arrive. She found Abby some raviolis at one of the little vendor carts, but couldn't find anything she liked. She resigned herself to eating whatever there was at the American pavilion...until I gave her a bite of mine. Now, I am making the trek between the American pavilion and the Morocco pavilion for the third time. Had I sent her back again...what am I saying...that would never happen. However, the end of our conversation ended with me saying, "Yes Dear." and you can probably fill in the rest of the conversation. Actually I volunteered, but I did point out that I had offered this in the first place to which she replied, "But I didn't know I wanted it then." Guys will realize that that was the end of the conversation.
6:40 p.m. - During the Food and Wine Festival, they hold a concert series. Well on my way to Morocco (again) (sorry honey, I will let it go now) that night's concert was wrapping up. And tonight's performers? Hansen. That's right, THAT Hansen. Not only that, they were singing MMM Bop. I have seen Hansen perform MMM Bop in person. Kill me now, my life can only go down from here.
7:03 p.m. - Have to use the bathroom again. Guys, quickly in and out. Girls, huge line. However, we watch a guy take his girlfriend right into the guys bathroom and stand guard outside the stall. I guess if you really gotta go, you really gotta go.
7:16 p.m. - Stop in Italy, get a good picture.
7:21 p.m. - Stop in Germany, can't really get a good picture.
7:28 p.m. - Watch some Chinese gymnasts in China. Running out of time so we move to Norway.
7:38 p.m. - Norway ride is a huge hit with our kids. But not near as big a hit as the helmets and troll statue in the store following the ride.
8:01 p.m. - Visit the Mexico pavilion and go on their ride. A lady asked Braden why he wasn't in school. He was lost for words so I told her it was because he had bad parents who felt family vacations were more important.
8:30 p.m. - Park it in spot by the lagoon to watch the Reflections of Life show that starts at 9. I have to use the restroom and ask if anyone else does. No one does.
8:42 p.m. - Get back and...Logan needs to use the restroom.
8:52 p.m. - Get back and...the guy standing next to our family says he needs to use the restroom and can I take him. I hadn't realized that he, his wife and Shannon had been talking for a while and so it caught be completely off guard. Good joke though.
9:00 p.m. - Show starts...and Shannon and I forgot how loud the fireworks were for this show. Braden did not remove his fingers the entire show. Wouldn't have been a big deal except he had his Mars Bar in his hands when it started. At the end of the show, his hands were full of melted Mars Bar that could not be salvaged. Ok, now I am little peeved that they cost $3 each.
9:38 p.m. - Shannon and I lead the way back to where we parked the car. Shannon and I did not confer on where the car was parked, we both knew where it was. We both went to the same spot. And yet, no car. We walked for a half hour around that parking lot. No car. Almost all of the other cars have left. No car. Braden is crying, Logan is freezing and Abby is doing her best teenager impersonation. No car. We have no answer other than it must have been stolen. So, our family huddles together in the middle of a huge parking lot, and at Braden's suggestion, we have a prayer. He says it. We walk out to the main road and flag down Disney security and explain that it appears our car was stolen. The security person asks us when we arrived that morning and says we should be in a different lot and then proceeds to drive right to our car. I have never felt quite so stupid. Except...
Have you ever been so convinced about something that when you were wrong, you can't even conceive how that is possible? That is how Shannon and I felt. To this day, I remember parking on the north side of the monorail track. So does Shannon. We walked past the body of water separating the two parking lots. I swear we did. I remember the conversation we had when we did. I believe they somehow moved our car on us, because I honestly can not remember parking where that car ended up. It was crazy.
10:20 p.m. - Finally get everyone down. Unfortunately, we still need to do laundry or no one will have anything to wear the next day. Crap! Looks like another short night.
11:45 p.m. - Reflecting on the day. In spite of throwing up, lost cars, nausea, and a women's bathroom with only two stalls, it was an awesome, awesome day. Truly one that I will remember forever.
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