Since it is now a tradition in our family to blog each day of a vacation, (we do this so we can have a solid recollection of our trips and be able to go back and read about them as a family later on) I begin the daily recaps of the recent trip Shannon and I took to Maui and Oahu, HI. We took this trip to celebrate our 15th anniversary which occured this last January. I have always done these posts in a time specific manner. I will attempt that here, but know that it will not be exact, or in some cases, even that close. Since there are times when I wasn't even sure what day it was, it would be ridiculous to hint that I was always aware of the exact times that things occur. The following are only my best attempts at recollection:
7:15 a.m. - Lamar drives Shannon and I to the airport. It is right in the midst of rush hour. I would make some joke here, but frankly, there is nothing funny at all about rush hour.
8:07 a.m. - After getting three kids through security for our trip to Florida, we are now seasoned pros at getting through security in a timely manner. However, we did have the opportunity to be screened by the new show you naked security screeners. As long as I don't have to know what the picture looks like, seemed pretty harmless to me. Now we have an hour and a half to sit and wait for the plane. It seems so pointless to come two hours early to the airport and then sit and wait forever. (Ominous foreshadowing music begins to play, stay tuned.)
9:10 a.m. - Shannon's last visit to the bathroom before we board is highlighted by a 50 something year old woman crawling out from under the door of the bathroom stall on her belly, claiming she couldn't get the latch undone. I think I would have exhausted every attempt at fake karate in my arsenal before I would contemplate getting down on my stomach in an airport bathroom. (I pause to shudder)
9:32 a.m. - We get situated on the plane and the first thing Shannon does is go straight to the Sky Mall magazine. I cannot for the life of me figure out her fascination with this publication. I have never seen such a load of crap in my life. Yes there are some really different and unique inventions that would be cool. But everything is so pointless. After a few minutes of enduring my own personal QVC channel, I put my earbuds in and turn on the ipod. I am so glad this time away from our kids is giving us this time to communicate so freely with each other.
11:48 a.m. - Arrive in San Francisco without incident but find that our flight to Kahului, Maui has been delayed by two hours. That means we get to spend 4 hours in the San Francisco airport. We are dressed for Maui. The San Fran airport is not Maui. It more resembles the arctic circle. This is going to be a long four hours.
12:35 p.m. - As the gate area gets more and more crowded with those who are scheduled to be on our flight, the natives begin to get restless. Some poor ticket agent made the mistake of mentioning that some snacks might be provided during the wait. Well, the dogs set on him like a shiny slab of porterhouse steak. One woman began demanding that her "snack" should be free mai tai's. Yes, that is what we need. Let's add alcohol to this situation. I don't get people sometimes. There was quite a demand to know when these snacks would arrive when we all know they are going to be crap airplane stuff. But because it is free crap airplane stuff, people want it and they want it NOW!
12:50 p.m. - Mai tai lady thinks since we are all headed to Hawaii and they aren't providing free mai tais, that she will help the situation by playing Hawaiian music she has stored on her phone at full volume. This does not prove to be the hit I think she was hoping for, but then again, she could not seem to care less and so Don Ho it is for all of us. I sincerely hope she isn't staying at our hotel.
3:01 p.m. - With 15 minutes until boarding time, Shannon finds a place she could have had a pedicure done while she waited, but now we are out of time. Darn it. From my back pocket, our already heating up credit card gives a quiet sigh of relief.
4:10 p.m. - We get into the air and the pilot turns off the seat belt sign. I am very impressed with Shannon. She has had a very tough time with the fact that we would be flying over the ocean. That is big time fear of hers and she has faced it very well so far. However, I can't say the same for this lady who immediately stands up and walks to the back of the plane looking very anxious.
4:12 p.m. - Same lady walks down the other aisle back to the front of the plane.
4:15 p.m. - Wait, here she comes again. When she gets to the back of the plane, it takes a minute or so before the steward comes over the loud speaker asking if there is any medical personnel on the plane. All of this is doing wonders for Shannon's mental stability.
5:18 p.m. - In flight movie begins. It is Country Strong with Gwyneth Paltrow and Tim McGraw. I thought it looked stupid so I choose not to watch it.
6:09 p.m. - The anxious/crazy lady is now just doing laps around the plane. So what does Shannon do? She kicks her. Oh I am sure that will help the situation. Ok, so she didn't mean to kick her and she apologized. But seriously, at this point, I think we should be taking any precautions necessary to avoid causing any problems for this woman.
6:21 p.m. - They are having an in-flight contest to see who can guess the exact minute that we hit the half-way point to Hawaii. The winner gets a CD of Hawaiian music. YEAH!!! Thanks to mai tai lady, I think I am going to give this contest a pass.
7:09 p.m. - Even without listening in and only watching bits and pieces, I am feeling pretty good about my belief that Country Strong is stupid. From what I can tell, Gwyneth Paltrow spends the entire movie singing, crying and depressed, drinking, singing while crying and depressed, crying and depressed while drinking or in bed in her underwear doing all of the above including singing. How could this movie have bombed? I just don't get it.
5:10 p.m. - Hey, we have made it safely to Maui. With the three hour time difference, it is still light outside. We know we are not in Kansas anymore when we get off the plane and discover that the airport is open air. And perfect!!!
5:37 p.m. - I have looked forward to this trip for months. We have traveled hundreds, maybe even thousands of miles. All of my hopes and dreams are caught up in this amazing trip we have just embarked on. And what is the first thing we do when we arrive...??? That's right, we go to Wal-Mart. I am not kidding. Now there is a good reason. We know that stopping here will get us beach chairs and water shoes and stuff for a much cheaper price than we would pay when we get to our final destination, but seriously...WAL-MART? You will be happy to know, it looks exactly the same there as it does anywhere. And just to make us really feel at home, I am shopping and pass by a local with a shirt on that is 3 sizes to small so that we can see his gut hanging over his pants and when passes me, I am thrilled to discover that he is also giving us a view of a partial lunar eclipse without even bending over. AAAAHHHHH!!!!! Shannon dubs him our Hawaiian version of a red neck. Wal-Mart in the spring, it's universal.
6:32 p.m. - Yes, we did spend almost an hour in Wal-Mart and now we need to find someplace to eat. We find a little diner open called Da Kitchen. It is fantastic. I have Garlic Shrimp Fried Rice(Really warming up for that romantic week we are going to have) and Shannon has some Korean Noodles dish. It is soooo good. The only frightening thing is that the waitresses, while friendly, all wear tank tops and are extremely buff. If this is how every local female looks, I am set to feel highly intimidated and emasculated this entire trip as any one of the waitresses could easily have kicked my butt at any point during dinner.
7:41 p.m. - It is now time to begin the 45 minute drive out to our hotel in Lahaina. I am sure it is a beautiful drive, but it is now dark so we could be driving in New Mexico on our way to Virden for all I know. It makes me realize though how many places I have been where my first experience driving in a new locale has occured at night when I can't see any thing. Here is a list that may or may not be complete: Maui, Chicago, Atlanta (all the way to South Carolina), Gaerwyn Wales, Orlando.
8:34 p.m. - Arrive at our hotel and the lobby is also open air. We are greeted with shell leis and are assigned our room. Negative, miles away from an elevator and on the fifth floor. Positive, 25 feet from the beach and a balcony that overlooks the beach. We will take it. The picture at the top of the post is the view right outside of our room.
8:45 p.m. - We take a night time walk on the beach and the sand is softer than anything I have ever experienced before. This is going to be good.
10:30 p.m. - We are ready for bed. One reason we have the room that we have is they ran out of King size bed rooms. So we were upgraded to a deluxe ocean view room that has two double beds. I am sure they thought we would be disappointed. Boy were they wrong. We just majorly scored. We get an upgraded room with a bigger bathroom AND I don't have to be kicked out of my own bed for this entire trip. Life is very good.
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