Dentists And The Holidays

Shannon has always been a far more private person than me. I believe this is one of the reasons that the blog is left up to me. She is ok putting out one sentence on facebook, but beyond that, would prefer to follow the counsel of the many English people who would tell me, "I keep meself to meself." So when we were gearing up for Shannon to visit the dentist this week for a root canal, she told me specifically on Tuesday evening, "You better not blog about this." I informed her that her root canal (I am ok to mention that she had a root canal because she put that out on facebook.) was going to be the main focus in my next blog entry. That was not met with any enthusiasm whatsoever. So we agreed that I would write about her experience and then she would come along behind and blackout whatever she didn't want on the blog. The following is her experience:

Shannon arrived at Dr. Scott Lee's on the morning of Dec. 10, at approximately 8:30 a.m. Shannon does not like the smell of a dentist's office and was immediately apprehensive upon entering and catching a whiff of that familiar scent. They called her back and she had the opportunity to select a movie that she could watch during her procedure. She selected National Treatsure. At that point, -----------------------------------and----------------------------------"I'LL SHOW YOU ANOTHER SHOT"-----------------------------------then he proceeded to-----------------------------------------------------------(unintelligible crying) -------------------------------AAAAHHHHHHGHGHGHGH!!!!--------------------------------KILL ME NOW!!!!!----------------------------------------------------------at which point---------------------------------(more unintelligible mumbling possibly regarding suing his butt off)------------------------*%&!*#----------------------. She then returned home with the depressing news that she would be returning again the following Wednesday to finish the procedure.

I truly wish my wife the best with this and want her to know I love her. She did make the comment to me that she was pretty sure that the three C-sections she endured were not as bad as this experience. Recognizing that I ran the risk of having my head removed from my neck, I suggested she was a little to close to this experience at this point to make a true comparison. Fortunately, the Percoset had started to take some effect and I received only a nasty look.

Seeing Shannon experience this reminded me of my December experience of getting my wisdom teeth removed. It was a very depressing time for me because I had always been under the impression that if you didn't have to have your wisdom teeth out prior to going on your mission, they would never have to come out period. What a naive fool I was. Anyway, the morning of the procedure arrived and Shannon drove me over to the...I am not sure what the person who does this is called. I don't really care either. We were engaged at this point, scheduled to be married within about a month. I got to the office and went back to THE CHAIR and was pretty nervous. However, within minutes I was in a very special world with clouds and pink bunnies and other such happy things. I vaguely remember waking up and Shannon being there. The next thing I remember is being in her mom's car on the way back to my apartment. I asked how I had gotten there. Shannon informed me I had walked there with her help. I informed her that she was incorrect, I had walked no where. She informed me that, no, I had in fact walked to the car. I informed her back a little more emphatically that she was mistaken. I was very sure that I had not walked anywhere because it was not a part of my memory at all. She then challenged me with the question of "If you didn't walk to the car, you tell me how you got here." I had no answer and so I proceeded to drift in and out the rest of the way home.

Once back at my apartment, she tried to help me get comfortable on my bed and get ready to rest. My roommates, Mike Bradley and Preston Bigler were there and while hanging around, I don't believe they really cared about my comfort so much, they just thought it very entertaining to watch a highly drugged individual try to circumvent a messy college guys' apartment. I laid on the bed and Shannon turned around to take care of something and I told her she had a nice butt. I had not told her this previously as it seemed inappropriate in my fully aware state of mind. My happy place, drug addled mind thought it was perfectly reasonable to share this vital piece of information. I don't remember a lot, but I remember Mike and Preston found that declaration very funny. Once I was coherent again, I found I had a better understanding of why people would not want to get involved with drinking. Very weird things seem very plausible in that state of mind. Anyway, I then complained that the bed wasn't comfortable and I was bored. Shannon told me I needed to sleep. I said I wasn't tired. So she helped me on to the couch and put on Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade for me. By the time she got it in and pushed the play button, I had somehow fallen asleep. My only other real memory of this time is that the only thing that felt good on my cheeks was frozen burritos. Go Figure.

So our family has a strong history of dental work around the holidays. Shannon and I both have appointments next week. Mine is a couple of fillings need to be repaired. Hers is much worse I'm afraid. So when our kids get individual rock collections made up from fine stones found in our driveway for Christmas, at least we can say, "But kids, don't our teeth look good and at least we allowed another family, Dr. Scott Lee's family, to have a brighter holiday. " At that point, Shannon can invoke the true Christmas spirit by quoting Charles Dickens. "God Bleth Uth, Evewy One."